This Is, My Love
by Maggiexlove
Summary: Bella and Edward have just recently moved in together. Follow their adventures as they discover each other in every way possible.
1. Fuck My Life

**Summary: **Bella and Edward have just recently moved in together. Follow their adventures as they discover each other in every way possible.

**Disclaimer: **All publicly recognizable characters, settings, situations, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. No copyright infringement is intended.

Chapter One

Edward and I have been together for two years-well a year and a half if your not counting the time we were just friends—two wonderful, happy, love filled years. We met in our senior year of high school when I moved to Forks, Washington to live with my dad. To say we hit it off pretty fast is an understatement.

Of course we didn't actually become official until 6 months after we met. I had been too shy to ask Edward to be my boyfriend and Edward didn't want to ruin the amazing friendship that we already had. Finally senior prom rolled around and Edward asked me to go with him. After that magical, romantic night Edward finally asked me to be his girlfriend, and of course I said yes.

Ever since that night we have been completely inseparable. We ended up getting into the same college and moved into an apartment together not to far from campus. We have lived together for over three months but our relationship is and always has been incredibly chaste. Sure we have make out session that sometimes lead to some heavy petting, but we have never had sex, or even gone as far as seeing each other naked—except for the two 'accidental' boobie flashes. Even though Edward and I share an apartment and even share the same bed, we have been stuck on second base.

It wasn't until Edward had come home early one day to find me masturbating on the couch that I finally realized that it's time for Edward and I to move forward…

I am horny.

That is the only way to describe how I'm feeling right now. Living with Edward for the last couple months has been amazingly torturous. Sleeping beside him every night took some getting used to, it's not like I could just rub one out right beside him.

What made it even worse was the fact that he insisted on not wearing a shirt to bed and even around the house. He claims that he feels more comfortable shirtless, but I think he is doing it just to torture me.

This morning we woke up entangled in each other's arms, which is the norm. The only difference was his leg was over my thigh and I could feel his morning wood against my stomach, and from what I could feel, he was huge. I so desperately wanted to reach down and grab him, but my shyness got the better of me.

I lay in that bed with Edwards hard on pressed against me for almost an hour and I couldn't do anything about it. If I moved he would wake up and I knew he needed his sleep.

Finally he woke up and rolled off of me. Immediately I rolled onto my side facing away from him so he wouldn't see the blush that was coloring my cheeks a bright red.

"Morning beautiful." He said, kissing my shoulder.

"Morning." How can someone be so fucking hot in the morning? His messy bed hair and his groggy voice was making me wetter and wetter.

"Was I crushing you?" He asked wrapping his arm over my waist and moving up against my curled body to spoon me. There it was again. This time I felt it against my bottom pushing against my ass.

"No." I replied, closing my eyes again. This man would be the death of me.

"Mmm, your so beautiful Bella. I love waking up to you every morning." He placed wet kisses down my arm and back up again. "Are you hungry? I could make some pancakes." It was Sunday morning, which means breakfast in bed. Edward and I usually set aside Sundays as our day to spend time together. With out hectic schedules with school and work we could go days without having an actual conversation during the week. I didn't want to leave this bed quite yet. I felt my burning up face start to cool down, and a new feeling was replacing my embarrassment. I felt completely turned on as Edward kissed my skin.

"Not really hungry, lets cuddle a bit longer." I turned around to plant a kiss on his lips

"Love you, Bella." He whispered against my lips. One thing I noticed about Edward was he never has bad morning breath, he has said the same thing about me too.

He kissed me back deepening the kiss. He placed a hand on the side of my face and ran it through my long hair. I draped an arm around his neck as we broke apart and touched foreheads. I looked up at him through my eyelashes and looked deep into his eyes.

"I love you so much baby." I whispered. I could feel Edwards erection against my stomach again, and wondered if he was aware that it was pressing against me.

I gave him another kiss on the lips and rolled over so that I was on top of him. He looked a little surprised but smiled as I leaned down and kissed him passionately. His tongue licked across my bottom lip and opened my mouth to take his tongue in. We lay there for a while our tongues intertwining. Our breathing was getting heavier and heavier as we kissed.

And then the phone rang.

I moved back and Edward smiled in apology.

"Fucking bad timing" I groaned as I shifted off Edward allowing him to reach for his phone. I leaned against the headboard waiting patiently

"Hello…nope, I was already awake…It's due on Monday? I thought it was due on Wednesday…Fuck I haven't even started, anyways thanks for letting me know…bye." He hung up the phone and turned to me sheepily.

"Who was that?" I asked, already knowing that I would hear some bad news.

"James, he was just telling me that our essay is due tomorrow." He explained. "I'm sorry Bella, I know Sunday is our day, but I really have to work on this."

"It's okay." I said moving forward to kiss him. "Go work on your paper, we'll hang out tonight."

"Okay, I love you."

Edward climbed out of bed and I could see his erection had gone down in his pajama bottoms. I sighed and lay back down feeling disappointed and horny.

Edward got showered and dressed and headed to the library to try and finish his paper. Ten minutes after he walked out the door I stripped down to my tank top and panties, feeling an urgent need to relieve some of the tension that being around my boyfriend regularly had caused. Masturbating is something I have only done a handful of times, and I have only orgasmed once or twice in my life. The first time was when I was 15 years old. My best friend Jessica had been telling me about what her boyfriend at the time had done to her the night before. She explained in graphic detail that he used his fingers to make her orgasm. Being so young and naïve I had never even explored my…area, so I didn't know that was possible. That night I touched my body in a way that I never had before…sexually.

I performed some self-loving and after about two hours I managed to orgasm. The second time I made myself orgasm was after I first met Edward. I was at a constant state of arousal because of his amazingly good looks. I rubbed one out in my room and managed to cum just before Charlie came into my room to check on me. Ever since them I have been too afraid to even touch myself down there while Charlie was in the house mainly cause I was afraid of being caught in the act.

Everything about Edward made him the perfect boyfriend. The fact that he was so gorgeous, and sweet, and gentle and loving. His green eyes that I could look into for hours, his fit body that he was not afraid of showing off around the house, the playful way he had about him, from his sense of humor to his relaxed personality. Unfortunately all these things pushed all the right buttons in me. Often.

I removed my bra and sat cross-legged on the couch. Just as I was really starting to get into it—one hand inside my panties and the other cupping my breast—Edward barged into the apartment rambling about having forgotten something. He stopped mid-sentence and stared. His mouth opened and closed.

I recovered from my shock first and screamed, _"Oh my God, Oh, me God! Get out! Close your eyes! Stay there! Shit. Just Go!" _I scrambled to pull on my top and clamped my legs together, throwing the remote at Edward as a distraction while I sprinted from the room.

Embarrassment swept over me as I sat on the floor of the bathroom hugging my knees to my chest.

I heard a knock at the door, but didn't answer. There was no way I was facing Edward right now. The rest of my clothes were still out there.

"Um…I had to come back for my textbook…I'll be back later tonight ok?" He said. I still didn't answer. I heard his footsteps as he walked away from the door, and a couple seconds later I heard the door open then close.

Fuck. My. Life.

**Thanks for reading! Please review :)**

_**MaggieXLove **_

**XOXOXO**


	2. Taking it All In

**Summary: **Bella and Edward have just recently moved in together. Follow their adventures as they discover each other in every way possible.

**Disclaimer: **All publicly recognizable characters, settings, situations, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. No copyright infringement is intended.

Chapter two.

I sipped from my can of Pepsi and stirred the brown rice bubbling in the pot on the stove. It was already after seven. He'd be home any minute now.

My exhibitionist moment was the most embarrassing moment of my entire life. Luckily I hadn't been calling out Edward name at the time. If he had turned up thirty seconds later it would have been a different story. I spent the rest of the day cleaning around the house and finishing up some homework before I started cooking dinner. Even with my attempts at trying to distract myself from what happened it was still at the back of my mind.

And I was still horny.

I heard the front door open and close as I took the pot of rice over to the island bench to drain while I waited for Edward to appear. Moments later he entered the kitchen, sending me a grin while he strolled across the tiled floor barefoot.

"Hey baby." He said. He had changed into black athletic shorts and a sleeveless red top that revealed his muscled arms.

Yup, he would be the death of me.

"Hi." I smiled and met his eyes briefly. He came over to me and kissed my forehead gently before walking to the fridge to get a drink. "Dinner's almost ready if you want to set the table."

His hair gleamed under the lights as he quickly set the table. I left the drained colander in the sink, switched off the burner under the stir-fry and went about serving up dinner.

When we were both sitting in the dining room beside the floor-to-ceiling window that showcased the twinkling lights of the city, I speared a piece of chicken and shoved it into my mouth. I chewed and swallowed, then quickly replaced it with another to avoid having to talk to Edward.

I wished things could return to normal between us, that we could go back to sharing our flirty banter and having fun together. Now it was just awkward and the fault lay entirely on me.

My eyes remained directly on my plate as we ate in complete silence.

"It's natural, you know," Edward said breaking the deafening silence. I looked up and found his gaze roaming my face, taking everything in. "To want to do that, I mean. Everyone does it."

I closed my eyes. "I don't want to talk about it, Edward."

"I know."

I opened my eyes and forced myself to look at him. "Then why are you bringing it up?"

"We need to talk about it." He balanced his fork on the edge of his plate. "This is serious. The tension around here's putting me off my food."

Although it didn't help at all I still appreciated his attempt to bring humor into the conversation. "Can't we just pretend it never happened?" I asked.

"Bella, it did happen and it's not a big deal baby. You're just turning it into one."

My eyes widened. "That's easy for you to say. How would you feel if I walked in on you…pleasuring yourself."

"I don't know because it's never happened to me. I always go somewhere private to…pleasure myself." I heard the humor in his tone. "I've never set up camp on the couch before and just gone for it." It took me a minute to process what he had just implied.

Edward masturbates…often.

_Oh, my God. _If the humiliation at hearing his words wasn't enough now I had the image of Edward all aroused to contend with too. I pushed my plate away and leaned my forehead against the table. "I'm just going to bang my head here until I knock myself out, okay?"

"C'mon." His patient amusement only made the situation that much worse. Why couldn't I be the mature one here?

Chair legs scraped against tile then his hand wrapped around my upper arm. He tugged me reluctantly into a standing position. Knowing he wanted to talk about it rather than eat his dinner made me realize just how determine he was to fix the problem.

I tilted my head to stare at him, blown away by the jolt of awareness I experienced whenever I looked into his eyes.

"Why does this bother you so much?" He asked. His brows pulled together as he studied me.

"Is it really that hard to understand? You saw me with my hand in my panties, Edward. You saw my boobs too." I turned my head and stared out the window, wishing I could be anywhere other than here…with him…talking about the first placeholder on my list of embarrassing moments.

"Yes, that's true…and they were very nice."

My eyes flicked back to him to check whether he was making fun of me but his compliment appeared to be sincere. "Thank you." I said.

"No, thank you."

A reluctant smile appeared across me face. I should have talking about it with him when it actually happened instead of hiding in the bathroom and leaving Edward to address the issue. It would have been a lot simpler. Still… "It just feels like I'm at a disadvantage. You saw me during a private moment." I said looking down at my feet.

Edward pulled me into his strong arms and hugged me close. I loved that even though this was being a complete baby about this whole thing, he still could find it in him to get passed the teasing, and just comfort me.

"Do you want me to jerk off in front of you to make things even?" He asked.

My stomach fluttered at the thought. I knew he was joking to lighten the mood but when I opened my mouth to speak the word that wanted to come out was yes. "I don't know." I said against his chest.

We were silent for a couple minutes, holding each other, as our food got cold on the table. After a while Edward grabbed my hand and pulled me into the living room onto the couch.

"In the two years we've known each other we've never once had sex." Edward absently stroked my long dark hair, his fingers combing through the strands. I shifted so that I lay with my head on his lap, my legs extended along the length of the couch. "Why's that, do you think?"

"I don't know...we've never even talked about it before." I replied looking up at him while he looked down into my eyes.

"Well then…let's talk about it."

"Okay." I said, excited that we were finally having this conversation.

It was silent for a few awkward beats and I didn't know how to even start.

"Well, you're not a virgin." I started.

"And you are…that's kind of the reason I have never brought it up to you." I shot up from his lap and turned to face him.

"What?" I asked incredulously.

"I just figured you should be the one to bring it up. I didn't want you to feel pressured into doing anything you didn't want to. I figured that when your ready, you'll bring it up." He explained. I pondered over his words.

"But it's been two years, I didn't bring it up because I didn't think you want to have sex with me. I guess I just thought that if you found me sexy or if I turned you on even a little bit that you would ask me."

Edward closed his eyes briefly, and then opened them taking my hands in his.

"Of course I find you sexy Bella…your so fucking sexy it drives me crazy…haven't you felt me pressing my erection against you lately, I've been trying to hint at you that you turn me on."

"_Oh!" _I started hitting his chest playfully, "You've been doing that on purpose? Do you know how much torture you have put me through?" I exclaimed.

"Well its not like you've ever done anything about it. I just thought you saw our relationship as chaste.

"First of all I tried to do something about it this morning but you interrupted me, second of all I don't want our relationship to be chaste anymore. We live together now and I think it's time to take it to the next step." Edward smiled at my words and pulled me close to him again.

"I am so glad to hear you say that." He whispered as he pulled me onto his lap.

The intensity in his gaze left me completely breathless. I gasped and pressed my mouth to his, my tongue plunging between his lips, my hands roaming his body, feeling place I had never felt before. Hear radiated off him and his muscles flexed beneath my fingers. His strength aroused me in a way I'd never thought possible.

Edwards's mouth left mine just long enough for him to grab the hem of my t-shirt, drag it up my body and toss it aside. I sat before him in my shorts and blue lace bra; my hair draped over one shoulder, with swollen lips. We sat for a second just staring at each other, taking it all in.

"Are we really doing this…tonight?" I asked feeling slightly nervous. I was about to lose my virginity and I had no idea what it would be like.

"Only if you want to Bella, we can wait a couple days so you can…prepare yourself." Looking into his eyes I knew Edward didn't want to wait to make love to me for another second.

And neither did I.

"No, let's do this, right now." I said. Breathless and needy, I reached for him again. He groaned and kissed me hard, flicking open the clasp on my bra and whipping it from my body. His hand closed over my bare breast, massaging my flesh, his thumb sweeping across my nipple. A thrill shot through me and I pressed myself to him, holding him tight. My tongue caressed his, my fingers digging into his shoulders.

Edward pushed himself off the couch and took me with him. He helped me to my feet and worked on my zipper, shoving my shorts and panties over my hips. He pulled me to him again, giving the impression he didn't want to let my go for more than a few seconds. It only made me want him more.

"Oh, God, Bella…this is…I need you." I stepped from my puddled clothes and grabbed fistfuls of Edwards t-shirts, peeling it over his head. Our lips met again and I poured everything into the kiss. I fumbled with the button on his jeans, dragging them open.

Before I could free his erection, he lifted my in his arms and gripped my ass. "Bed." He said against my mouth. I had never seen this dominant side of Edward and I really loved it.

I clutched his body, linking my ankles at his back and sinking my hands into his hair. He walked with me into the hallway and into our bedroom. I slid my fingers into his open jeans and clasped his erection, squeezing his length as he lay on top of me kissing every inch of my skin.

I felt nerves fill my stomach as I felt his length through the fabric. I wasn't quite sure if he would fit and was mostly afraid of the pain I would feel during operation insert Edward's mammoth cock into Bella's tight pussy.

Edward let out a deep groin and stood up at the side of the bed. He shoved his boxer briefs over his erection. He stood with his hand gripping his cock, rubbing it slowly up and down his long shaft.

I stared at him as he masturbated in front of me looking like a roman god.

"There, now we're even." He said as he climbed back on top of me to kiss my lips. I let out a nervous laugh as he kissed my lips. "Your so beautiful Bella. I've wanted you like this for so long."

"Me too baby." I said quietly. He moved back from my neck and looked at my face.

"Are you okay?" He asked. I was quiet for a beat, but knew I couldn't lie to him. Not over this.

"It's just…your cock is really big. I'm afraid it will hurt…a lot."

"Oh!" He climbed off of me and lay beside me on his side resting his head on his arm. He kissed my cheek before he said, "It's okay Bella...we'll take it slowly. We don't have to rush."

I nodded my head as he moved his hand over my torso, awakening sensations in me that had never been touched. His hand gently hovered over my skins squeezing my breast occasionally.

Exhilaration and arousal had my pulse racing, my skin flushing. My stomach reeled with pleasure.

His hand ventured lower and lower until he was cupping my center. I sucked in a breath as he found my clit and began stimulating it. He expertly played with my clit successfully making me more and more wet.

"I can feel you getting wetter Bella, that's a good thing…it'll make it easier." He said. I turned my face to him to kiss his lips gently before I turned my head back to watch his hand.

I felt a finger at my entrance and gasped as he inserted it slowly into my tight pussy.

"Is this okay?" He asked. I nodded, closing my eyes as he pushed his finger in and out. I noticed right away when he had added another finger. I felt him stretching me preparing me for his big cock.

"Ohhh yes…feels good." I whispered gripping his arm.

I felt his erection against my leg and reached down to grab it.

"Fuck yes Bella, stroke my cock." He whispered into my ear. I awkwardly stroked up and down his length, not really sure if I was doing the right thing. His moans and groans were definitely assuring though. From what I could tell, Edward was at least 8 inches long.

We lay like this for a while, simply masturbating one another, kissing and whispering sweet nothings to each other.

"Bella if you don't stop…I'm gonna cum." He said grabbing my hand to stop me. I smiled at the fact that I was a natural at giving Edward pleasure.

"I need you Edward…inside me…right now." I begged. We looked into each others eyes and new it was time. Edward reached into his drawer beside the bed and grabbed a condom.

I didn't even know those were there.

He opened the package and rolled the condom onto his penis.

Edward kneeled in front of me, and I felt his cock right at my entrance.

"If it hurts too much, just tell me to stop okay?" He said leaning down to kiss me. My arms wrapped around him and I tucked my face in against his throat and released a strangled cry as he guided his cock inside me slowly.

"Slowly!" I cried as he pushed into me. I could feel him stretching me as he pushed deeper and deeper.

"Are you okay…."I couldn't reply seeing as I was having a hard time breathing. "Breath Bella, just breath…relax your muscles okay." He instructed. I nodded as I tried to breath deeply. The more I relaxed the better it felt and the easier it became to take it in. I knew the second Edward had broken my hymen. I let a loud cry and felt a couple tears escape from my eyes.

Edward was breathing hard from the control as he held himself still for what seemed like ages. Slowly the pain subsided and was replaced with arousal. Edward kissed my face gently as I became accustomed to him, wiping my tears as he patiently waited for me.

My stomach reeled with pleasure as the feeling of Edward inside me began to feel good.

"Move in me Edward. Make love to me." I whispered. I pushed my hips towards Edward to meet the thick glide of his cock. He pulled back and drove into me again, his breaths harsh, his body tense as I took him in. He moved back onto his knees and drove into me again and again. We stared into each other's eyes as we connected like this for the first time. His eyes were fiery in their intensity, roaming my face, my breasts, taking everything in. He sank into me and retreated again.

"You feel so good Bella…fucking tight." He grunted as he made slow love to me.

"_Ahhh…Edward…that's so good." _ Edward chest brushed against my nipples, hardening them to tingling points. He leaned in and kissed me, his quick breaths expelling against my cheek. The sensations overwhelmed me. I needed to come.

_I needed it so badly._

Edward plunged inside me over and over, his movements so deep, so forceful, I knew it wouldn't take long. A groan rumbled in his throat and he kissed me harder, his fingers gripping my ass. His speed increased and I felt it building inside me.

"I'm close Edward…_So close."_ I tore my mouth from his and tilted my head. His lips moved to my throat and I dragged in a breath as it came over me. My orgasm crashed in a wave that sucked me under, had my shaking, pulsing around him.

"_Ohhh…_Yes Bella. I can feel you squeezing me, so tight. I'm coming baby." My thighs clenched and I held on tight. The tip of his tongue traced the length of my throat. Desire surged and my hips lifted. I let out a loud sigh and collapsed, trembling, against his supporting arm.

My eyes closed and my heart pounded as Edward gave one final shove, his sound of surrender one of the most erotic things I'd ever heard. His mound left mine and I wrapped my arms around him, resting my lips against his racing pulse in his throat.

"That was..." I started.

"Amazing." Edward finished for me. We lay in bed entangled in one another's arms. After a while we realized that we had never finished our dinner.

"Pizza?" Edward asked.

"Yes please."

**Thanks for reading! Please review :)**

_**MaggieXLove **_

**XOXOXO**


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